Temping in the Name of the Law

[dotinthesky]

Judge Judy is my new favourite show. It could have been an earlier favourite if I hadn't always held her in contempt after seeing her one too many times on Access Hollywood. Alas, I never knew what I was missing until I started arriving home exhausted, plopping myself in front of the television, and watching her unravel cases like a Hercule Poirot for the 21st century.

Judge Judy rules. She's quotable ("We don't dispense awards for DUMB"), she's tough ("Only cowards join street gangs" she said to a yellow-teethed skinhead), and she's intelligent ("if they had invented a pill that could make women gain overnight, with no health risks, breasts like Dolly Parton don't you think their company would have gone international?")

Judge Judy is teaching me a lot about the law and how to catch out liars. I've been cast adrift in this world until now, not paying attention to the papers I was signing, trusting the benevolent smiles of greasy real estate agents. She's teaching me that the only things that count are: receipts, witnesses and more receipts. As for liars, they always contradict themselves. Nothing stops a liar faster on his track when you throw in their face the contradictory story they are weaving.

Apart from Judge Judy, I've been working like a galleon slave, fighting that stupid cough that is now entering it's 8th week (maybe I'm allergic to the Sissys flowers, maybe I'll die of pneumonia), playing far too little Gamecube, swimming occasionally (and hiding my flip flops inside my towel when I'm in the pool) and generally being a good, respectable British citizen.

If only I could see my Livejournal friends more often...

Comments

[dreamwarrior.livejournal.com]

LOL I use to like Jugde Judy. then i got sick of her and hate her. In my hea when i was reading this i could see you saying Jugde Judy saved my life!!

[4q.livejournal.com]

sooooo....I miss you and stuff

[suddenflight.livejournal.com]

I have always had love for Judge Judy.

[violentlyhappy.livejournal.com]

Judge Judy should be hailed as the new queen of the world...Or at least America...She could run rings around Dubya... =o) ♥

[canudiglett]

Liars always tell very complicated and detailed stories and get very offended if you doubt them in the slightest.

Are you still going to the Dim Sum thing tomorrow? We're trying to decide whether to go as neither of us is very keen on Dim Sum but we like Being Sociable so want to see who is going.

[cedarseed.livejournal.com]

I agree, I think Judge Judy rocks. She's soooo no-nonsense, I wish I could catch more of her shows.

[desayuno-ingles.livejournal.com]

you don't have health insurance, do you? wait, you live in Britain. don't they dispense that with the water? Ummm...Judge Judy is so annoying! I hate those judge shows. Texas Justice is a particularly offensive brand.

[ickycrawlything.livejournal.com]

Document and make copies of everything! I was half-assed at this as well until I became "military"....did you know that they will not only give your child ALL of his shots again if they don't have paper work staring at them in the face but they will give them to you as well?!?! Wtf? My files are color coded now.