dotinthesky: (Default)
Dot in the Sky ([personal profile] dotinthesky) wrote2007-03-06 08:15 am
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Breast Mystery

Yesterday, on Bank station's busy platform, a baby begins to cry. The mother, to my right, picks up the baby, sits down, and gives her tit to the baby for a feed. Incongruous looks from some commuters (it doesn't bother me).

To my left, a 17-year-old blonde builder opens his copy of The Sun, right on the page 3 girl, and stares at her breasts as if his life depends on it.

[identity profile] sparklielizard.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 08:32 am (UTC)(link)
Welcome to my world :-/

What gets me particularly is that over Christmas The Sun ran a "fashion" article predicting breastfeeding in public would be "out" this year, and to put it away. It was written by a woman as well.

[identity profile] steer.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 09:34 am (UTC)(link)
Hah... classic. Well, I guess it's written largely by reptiles so you can't expect them to be keen on lactation.

[identity profile] sparklielizard.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 09:40 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, they'd probably prefer a baby to cry as it helps them locate their prey better!

Breasts

[identity profile] mirple.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 09:04 am (UTC)(link)
I thought your post was clever. why do people (not myself) find breast feeding, one of the most natural things in the world, offensive, but gratuitous displays, such as page three of the sun, acceptable. it is totally confused!

Re: Breasts

[identity profile] commonpeople.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 03:26 pm (UTC)(link)
I've given up trying to understand people.

[identity profile] steer.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 09:35 am (UTC)(link)
I must admit it's slightly uncomfortable when friends do it -- but only because you're supposed to look at someone you're talking to but not stare at their breasts. But it is sort of fascinating to watch a baby feed. I always worry I might slightly cross that line from looking to staring. :-)

[identity profile] sparklielizard.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 09:47 am (UTC)(link)
I was awkward watching friends do it too before I had a baby. I can't speak for every breastfeeding mother, but somehow so long as someone isn't staring in a really creepy way at the mechanics, I can safely say I only feel awkward about it out of fear the people I'm talking to might feel awkward because they think I feel awkward ;-) I'd like to hope there's nothing on display (despite B's best intentions) so in theory you should just be able to carry on a conversation with me in the same way you would normally. In theory!

Perhaps because society has made it such a taboo is why we feel awkward watching friends especially do it. It's a real pity.

[identity profile] steer.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 11:18 am (UTC)(link)
(Grin) That's a weird "spiral of awkwardness" -- I'm awkward because I think someone else might be awkward and they're awkward because they think I might be!

[identity profile] sparklielizard.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 11:39 am (UTC)(link)
Exactly! And even knowing that doesn't make it any easier either!

[identity profile] commonpeople.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 03:32 pm (UTC)(link)
As far as I can remember, it's not a taboo in Brasil. We tend to be quite easy going with nudity, or with the body in general, and because we are a Catholic country (i.e. the worship of the Virgin and baby Jesus) we tend to look at breastfeeding with no contempt.

To me, people who are freaked out by breastfeeding probably come from conservative backgrounds, where there is an issue with the human body. But that's just my opinion.

[identity profile] sparklielizard.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 04:48 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, that makes you at least one friend I can definitely breastfeed in front of without worrying! :-)

It's very odd - as soon as I started breastfeeding, beyond the initial weirdness I stopped seeing my breasts as anything other than a food supply for B. Which is why I don't have any qualms about feeding her anywhere - my issue is what other people think rather than my own embarrassment and I don't want to upset people.

I wish people in this country were less hung up on nudity. I fully admit to having a problem with it myself and you won't catch me in any communal changing areas. I wish this culture didn't have that problem as it would be nice not to worry about it.

[identity profile] commonpeople.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 05:10 pm (UTC)(link)
I think there's a segment of the British population which is very comfortable with nudity. I see it at the gyms I've belonged, where parents and children get naked together in the shower room (something my parents neved did with me.) And then there's the love of the page 3 girl, nudism, etc.

But yes, there is a large portion of people who are uncomfortable, for silly reasons I think.

[identity profile] sparklielizard.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 05:29 pm (UTC)(link)
I think the love of the page 3 girl is a different thing to liking nudity. It's still a covert love of the human form, in a sexual way, rather than an open, comfortable lack of inhibitions, non-sexual thing. There are some British people who are fine with it, I agree, but there's not many of them! You'd be seeing the minority who are because the rest of us would never dare venture to such places where we might have to expose a thigh ;-)

It is silly reasons, but it's as ingrained as apologising when someone walks into us, so there's little I think that can change society en-masse now. Maybe gradually over a few generations, and then only if people really wanted to. Mixing in cultures for whom even showing an ankle is considered taboo probably won't speed things along though!

[identity profile] kixie.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 10:39 am (UTC)(link)
Gosh, that's miserable.

[identity profile] commonpeople.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 03:32 pm (UTC)(link)
That's rush hour for you.

[identity profile] amberholic.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 11:09 am (UTC)(link)
It's ironic... Boobs are on display everywhere but as soon as they're there for a practical reason, everyone suddenly gets all conservative.

[identity profile] commonpeople.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 03:33 pm (UTC)(link)
I think it depends on the person's background. Someone who comes from a liberal, educated upgringing wouldn't have a problem (I presume).

[identity profile] amberholic.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 03:34 pm (UTC)(link)
By "everyone" I was generalising... a lot.

[identity profile] violentlyhappy.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 02:05 pm (UTC)(link)
Hahaha. Oh the paradox of it all.

[identity profile] commonpeople.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 03:33 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh the multiple layers of meanings!

[identity profile] violentlyhappy.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 06:11 pm (UTC)(link)
I can't wait to get down there and experience this twighlight zone that is London on a daily basis for myself. xD

We're taking the place in Victoria by the way! I'll be coming down on the 17th to sign the rental agreements, etc.

[identity profile] commonpeople.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 06:39 pm (UTC)(link)
I hope you don't have any problems with your apartment/landlord. Or with London.

[identity profile] violentlyhappy.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 06:41 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks Ollie, same here. I'm sure it'll be really great! :)
izzybees: (Default)

[personal profile] izzybees 2007-03-06 04:51 pm (UTC)(link)
When my sister picked me up at the airport there was a woman openly breastfeeding her child, and not only did my sister express disgust on the scene but for days afterward. She just could not get over it.

It didn't bother me at all!

[identity profile] commonpeople.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 05:10 pm (UTC)(link)
That's strange, considering your sister is a mother!
izzybees: (Default)

[personal profile] izzybees 2007-03-06 05:16 pm (UTC)(link)
I know! Her issue with it was that she didn't want to see the breast. She thought the woman should have worn a blanket to hide it. My sister doesn't breastfeed in public at all, though, even with a blanket. It embarrasses her, so that is probably what the issue is. She wouldn't do it herself and she can't understand why anyone else would feel comfortable enough to.

[identity profile] aeonflux.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 05:21 pm (UTC)(link)
Over here, as well, people have a thing about public breastfeeding. In my Gender and Human Sexuality class we've been discussing how motherhood is one of the most idealized, yet least appreciated roles for women. So apparently being a mother is the highest thing a woman can do, but she should do it where it won't bother anyone else...or maybe that seclusion is part of its appeal for society, because then she won't be out there voting and driving the market and changing the status quo. Sorry, this is me, stepping off my soapbox. But really, would people prefer that babies go hungry? If that's the rule, then we should ban public restaurants--no public eating for anyone!

[identity profile] commonpeople.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 06:43 pm (UTC)(link)
A recent story in the news, over here, highlighted the problem of how many mothers at work are discriminated. Article here (http://www.guardian.co.uk/gender/story/0,,2023867,00.html).

In London, everyone has a story of witnessing a pregnant mother get into a bus or train and not be offered a seat. People look up, then go back to their books or newspapers.

[identity profile] sublimevisions.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 07:22 pm (UTC)(link)
the obvious solution to further the story would be to switch the 17 year old lad and the baby. just a thought.

::runs away quickly before someone throws a chair at me::

[identity profile] commonpeople.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 07:26 pm (UTC)(link)
Hey, nobody is going to get angry with you expressing your innermost desires. ;-)

[identity profile] inottofogava.livejournal.com 2007-03-06 10:05 pm (UTC)(link)
Во-во, я согласен с предыдущем оратором! )) Если хошь, то можно встретиться. Со мной не заскучаешь! )

[identity profile] commonpeople.livejournal.com 2007-03-07 08:14 am (UTC)(link)
Вы летите к Paris для встречи?

[identity profile] chris---scott.livejournal.com 2007-03-07 03:56 am (UTC)(link)
Wonder how they would react if I pulled out a magazine to stare at ;-)

[identity profile] commonpeople.livejournal.com 2007-03-07 08:15 am (UTC)(link)
I think they'd be OK with your reading Honcho in public.