dotinthesky: (Default)
Dot in the Sky ([personal profile] dotinthesky) wrote2007-05-24 12:15 pm

Murder on his Mind

Yesterday, I almost murdered [livejournal.com profile] naturalbornkaos.

I was on my way home, changing tube trains at a particularly infernal Bank station, when I spotted him standing on the platform, reading a horror novel. I approached him quietly. I imagined his body falling on the tracks, the central line train cutting his body, splattering the sweaty commuters and the posters advertising third-world getaways.

Just as my hands grabbed him from behind and pushed, images of life in prison flooded my head; I immediately held on to his body and stopped him from falling on the tracks. You can guess how startled and shocked he was after staring death in the face.

We chatted while tube trains stuffed like sausages came and went. Finally, we decided to be assertive and push into a somewhat empty train. We said our goodbyes at Liverpool station and I made a mental note of stabbing him to death next time I see him (a possible cinema excursion).

I know you are not fond of Tarantino, but how about Grindhouse when it comes to London?

[identity profile] moveslikegiallo.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 11:22 am (UTC)(link)
Please try to refrain from murdering him. I quite like him alive. :(

[identity profile] commonpeople.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 11:31 am (UTC)(link)
How much are you willing to pay to keep him alive?

[identity profile] moveslikegiallo.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 11:41 am (UTC)(link)
Ummm.. brownies?

Also, I am now going to stand very, very far from the platform edge at any Central line stations in case I ever encounter you in another murderous mood.

[identity profile] kixie.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 11:26 am (UTC)(link)
I knew I hired the wrong assassin! ;)

[identity profile] commonpeople.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 11:48 am (UTC)(link)
Who did you hire? If you'd posted a proper job ad, you'd have seen I'm the most qualified for the job.

[identity profile] kixie.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 12:09 pm (UTC)(link)
I was implying that I hired you!

But if you're the most qualified, then go for it! Something discreet, but bloody if you can please!
I'll pay you with home cooked South American dishes!

[identity profile] naturalbornkaos.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 11:34 am (UTC)(link)
I am quite anxious to see "Grindhouse" actually, although I expect my back will be killing by the end of its two hundred year run time. On the bright side, I've already watched all the 'trailers' in the middle on Youtube, so at least I could nip out to the loo when they're on. ;)

(PS: I wasn't reading a horror novel and we didn't go all the way to Liverpool together - only Liverpool Street - but I guess you've got to dramatise these things for the full effect. ;))

[identity profile] commonpeople.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 11:43 am (UTC)(link)
Me? Dramatise events? NEVER!

I really want to see Grindhouse too. There's a short break apparently so you can stand up, get a coke, etc, during it. It was a problem in America because many people thought that was the end of the film, so they left.

[identity profile] naturalbornkaos.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 12:08 pm (UTC)(link)
The way I understood it was that the intermission consisted of three trailers for films that don't exist (directed by Eli Roth, Edgar Wright and Rob Zombie). I could be wrong though.

Either way, you've got yourself a date. I really want to see it.

[identity profile] desayuno-ingles.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 02:44 pm (UTC)(link)
I hear the Tarantino one is less than good but the Romero one is awesome.

[identity profile] moveslikegiallo.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 11:58 am (UTC)(link)
One of your bodice-rippers, was it?

[identity profile] naturalbornkaos.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 12:04 pm (UTC)(link)
Actually, yes. It was "A Place of Greater Safety" by Hilary Mantel. :)

I tend to alternate between pulp horror and epic bodice ripper ... ;)

[identity profile] kixie.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 12:12 pm (UTC)(link)
AND NEVER ANY GOOD LITERATURE! ;)

Sorry, I had to, I have poor impulse control.

[identity profile] amberholic.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 12:44 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm actually curious about Grindhouse after reading a whole article about it and violence against women in movies in G2.

I doubt it's a brilliant film(s) but at least it's got my curiosity piqued.

[identity profile] moveslikegiallo.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 12:50 pm (UTC)(link)
That article was beyond dreadful. :(

[identity profile] amberholic.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 01:24 pm (UTC)(link)
Indeed... but it did make me curious about Grindhouse as well as Hostel.

[identity profile] moveslikegiallo.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 01:29 pm (UTC)(link)
The stuff about Hostel was mostly what I objected to; they really got the wrong end of the stick on that one.

[identity profile] amberholic.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 01:53 pm (UTC)(link)
Haven't seen it so I can't really say but I thought Hostel was satirical and in that article they seemed to have completely missed that point.

[identity profile] moveslikegiallo.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 01:57 pm (UTC)(link)
There's certainly a difference between the kind of film Hostel is, and the kind of film the Guardian thinks it is.

Mind you, the Daily Mail's outraged articles about it got a major plot point wrong, so at least the Grauniad hasn't sunk quite that low...

I had a major rant about this, but basically I'm just losing faith in the Guardian all round. Their G2 that was all about the smoking ban was ridiculous, too.

[identity profile] moveslikegiallo.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 01:57 pm (UTC)(link)
Major major major.. and I haven't even been reading Catch 22 lately.

[identity profile] amberholic.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 02:03 pm (UTC)(link)
I was reading it passionately for a couple of weeks running up to the French elections and then gave up after that. I'm just too tired on the trains to read it now.

[identity profile] steer.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 01:30 pm (UTC)(link)
This is a bit of a change from being peaceful and nice grass. I am going to look very carefully at you if we ever have to take the tube together.

[identity profile] sallypointzero.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 03:17 pm (UTC)(link)
What would The Guardian have to say about 'The August Underground' dir.by Fred Vogel, I wonder?
(deleted comment)

[identity profile] commonpeople.livejournal.com 2007-05-24 07:21 pm (UTC)(link)
I already have so many reasons to bash people's heads in that I'm sure one more on the list won't make a difference. ;-)

[identity profile] saint-narcissus.livejournal.com 2007-05-25 12:47 am (UTC)(link)
shoving friends in front of oncoming tube trains sounds as much fun as I use to have when young, and I would torture and decapitate small furry animals.

[identity profile] commonpeople.livejournal.com 2007-05-25 07:14 am (UTC)(link)
:-O

Please tell me you are joking!

[identity profile] saint-narcissus.livejournal.com 2007-05-25 03:02 pm (UTC)(link)
ah! ,,, chortle,
me wicked little sense of humour!

[identity profile] kenoster.livejournal.com 2007-05-25 03:50 am (UTC)(link)
I just noticed the log lady. ha!

[identity profile] commonpeople.livejournal.com 2007-05-25 07:18 am (UTC)(link)
The Log Lady likes you.