Dot in the Sky (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
dotinthesky) wrote2008-06-14 07:41 pm
dotinthesky) wrote2008-06-14 07:41 pm
Posh People Suck
I saw two plays this week at the Royal Court. The first one was The Ugly One, a short comedy on the tragedy behind our obsession with beauty and plastic surgeries. The irony of this play being shown smack in the middle of Sloane Square, possibly one of the most shallow and vulgar neighbourhoods in London, wasn't lost on me. There was no set design, no costumes - as if the director wanted to say that anything like that would be just as superficial as the play's subject matter. But what started out slightly intriguing lost my interest, and its way, halfway through.
I'm on one of my hardly-often visits to Sloane Square. I am in a parallel universe; nowhere could be more different than the multicultural ragbag that is Tower Hamlets and Hackney. As soon as I step out of the Tube station, I'm faced with clean-cut boys talking to an Oyster credit card saleswoman; businessmen with floppy white hair joyously picking their noses; sloane rangers (yes, they do exist!) parading down the side-walks in their flawless pastel-coloured designer wear and bleach blonde hair. Tiffany, Hugo Boss, Cartier, God Knows What Else. Names, names, names. These shoulder-padded bon vivants still think Spandau Ballet is playing Top of the Pops. Designer labels are boring, Mesozoic.
Hunger makes me look for a kebab shop, a chippie, a corner store. I get lost in the streets with even rows of faux-mediterranean colours, sobriety and ancient cousins to the Queen who get escorted around by their eastern european nurses. There are antique stores everywhere - you can even buy something pre-historic, stuck to a bit of stone, if you want; but my hunger isn't enough to chow though rocks or a Louis XVI leg. These antique stores match so perfectly the antiques that stare at them. I see these old farts behind the shop windows, switching places with the lion statues and grecian urns suddenly free to go for a bit of shopping.
Relocated, which we watched today, is a very eerie and macabre piece of theatre. Both Kevin and I walked out of the theatre unsettled, disturbed. I keep thinking how brilliant it was, but sick too - how they managed to insert the "marvelously creepy" (as one of the characters said) into our minds. Think of the most horrifying and unsettling crime stories from the past ten years. Mix them with David Lynch. Thrown them into a dark and damp basement. Voila, you've got Relocated. Go see it.
On the way home, my travel card failed to register as I was going through the barriers. A sloane ranger, too close to me, had hers accepted so the barriers opened for me. In that slip second of doubt in her head, the barriers closed on her and the alarm went off. She turned bright red and turned to one of the Underground staff with her card. I looked apologetically at her; asked if she was on pay-as-you-go (concerned she might be overcharged for the mistake). She ignored me. I then gave the Underground staff my card and he said my card was the faulty one. No big deal.
Apparently, the girl called me "a cheeky fucker" to her two friends as she walked past Kevin. Not being in the best state of mind after seeing Relocated, I decided to go after her and have a Big Brother style brawl on the platform. Kevin, the ever sensible one, stopped me and said it wasn't worth it. I still gave her the evils though, even when she boarded the train before ours. A total WTF moment, which I suppose fits well with the day's theme.
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Posh neighbourhoods suck; trying to find a sandwich that wasn't over a fiver in Hampstead the other week was impossible; we ended up going to bleedin Tescos!
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There are chippies, you just need to walk to Victoria. I'm between the two stations and its' 5 mins to a chippie.
But yeah, the station seems...well, I love the Square with its fairly lights and stuff. But it's very poshish, isn't it? I have a big ol' soft spot for it though.
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I have to say I really like the Royal Court (the food in their basement cafe looks very yummy; I must give it a try); you are very lucky to live it, but not so lucky to live so many poshos!
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The basement cafe is nice, and yes, I like the Royal Court too. The poshos are extremely irritating, but it's easy enough to ignore them and look at the pretty houses and window shop and wander around listening to my mp3 player.
Ok, so yes, I often feel like pushing them into oncoming traffic, but it's fleeting ;)