2020 in Review

[dotinthesky]

Guess what I got up to in 2020?



What did you do in 2020 that you'd never done before?

• Survived a pandemic, like everyone else.


• Spent most of the year working on my writing or gardening.


• Practiced regular Ashtanga yoga and meditation.


• Went for walks within the guesthouse with my two cats, Amora and Paçoca.


• Cooked for my mom and learnt to make bread.


• Hung out with friends exclusively via video links.


• Became celibate.

Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I don’t make resolutions. Instead, for the past few years, I’ve been picking a word which I’d like my year to resonate with. In 2018, it was “adventure”, when my ex-boyfriend and I lived in a narrowboat. For 2019, I went for “serenity” and ended up leaving London for a quiet rural guesthouse in Brazil. In 2020, I picked “prosperity”. As I told a friend this morning, if being surrounded by trees and animals is prosperous, then I’m a billionaire!
For 2021, I’m picking “fitness”, as I lost muscle mass since leaving London and would like to get back into running and swimming.

Did anyone close to you give birth?
Only a few cousins.

Did anyone close to you die?
Yes, three very close friends. Lovely Tobi, who was a close friend in London; Flávia, a friend from Brazil who was waiting for a transplant that arrived too late; and Debbie, another friend from London.

What countries did you visit?
I remained within the confines of the guesthouse for most of the year.

What would you like to have in 2021 that you lacked in 2020?
Friends in flesh and blood. More hope in everyone, and happiness too. A lover or two would be great!

What date from 2020 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
The date my town went into lockdown, and the day Trump lost the election.

What was your biggest achievement of the year?
I put a lot of effort into my novel, working on it every morning. I have no idea what will come of it but it already succeeded in helping with my mental health.

What was your biggest failure?
I took on NaNoWriMo, hoping to nail down the novel’s entire structure, but I derailed towards the fourth week. I’ve got a new target, to write at least one page of the novel a day, starting on the 1^st of January.

Did you suffer illness or injury?
I caught a cold at the end of November and worried it might be COVID. I never got tested as here in Brazil the free test is faulty and the good tests cost money. But I didn’t have the key symptons, and nobody else in my house got sick, so I’m putting it down as a regular cold.

I’ve also been struggling off and on with lower back pain, which I suspect is just age…

What was the best thing you bought?
Maybe Kindle books? I also bought a cheap earphone so I can listen to podcasts on my walks.

Whose behaviour merited celebration?
Every health worker. It’s a shame Time magazine didn’t give them the cover of “Person of the Year” (Joe and Kamala were picked instead, as a two-fingers-up to Trump and his supporters I guess).

Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
Anyone who took advantage of gullible people with conspiracy theories. People who chose themselves over others.

Where did most of your money go?
I got a big tax rebate from the UK and it all went into the guesthouse. Any money we had went into DIY or food.

What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Vaccines rolling out! Joe Biden winning! Actually, bizarrely enough, I got into politics this year – Brazilian and American. I was fascinated not only by the car crash but by the whole “soap opera” aspect of it. I learnt a lot.

What song(s) will always remind you of 2020?
The Weeknd’s “Blinding Lights”, as the year’s first big song, but also because of it being popular on TikTok, which I got sucked into at the start of the year (like everyone else?)

I have a Spotify Playlist, 20:20, with all my favourite tracks in 2020:

Compared to this time last year, are you:

a) Happier or sadder?
Happier, in that I can better manage my moods and have learnt to accept where I am in life. I can see a mood coming on now and have strategies for dealing with it.

b) Bigger or smaller?
Smaller. I lost 11 pounds (5 kgs) since returning to Brazil, from a mixture of working a lot outdoors, eating less processed stuff, not drinking any alcohol, and not doing any strength training.

c) Richer or poorer?
Poorer. Although I got a hefty tax rebate, we needed it for the guesthouse, so it quickly left my bank account. I finally had to acknowledge that I wouldn’t be able to pay my 4 credit cards in the UK and so I spoke to Citizens Advice bureau about claiming bankruptcy. Apparently, as I’m no longer a resident, I can’t claim it! So I just have to sit tight for the next 6 years, when the banks will finally stop chasing me…

What do you wish you'd done more of?
Seen friends, visited São Paulo, visited London… done all those things that now seem like “bucket list” items.

What do you wish you'd done less of?
Read the news at the start of the pandemic. I got really anxious (like everyone else?)

How did you spend Christmas?
It was the quietest affair. My brother, sister-in-law and nephew came over and we had lasagne and a salad for dinner, followed with ice cream. We gave my mom a box of chocolate. I was in bed by 10pm, then on Christmas day I spent the morning playing my nephew’s Wii U videogame.

Did you fall in love in 2020?
Yes, with my cats Paçoca and Amora, who were my social life, my babies, my cuddling toys at night.

How many one-night stands?
Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha

What was your favorite TV program?
The Queen’s Gambit. It was so beautifully done. I watched one episode a night, savouring it to the very end.

Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
I don’t hate anyone. I have, however, realised that the world is divided in two types of people: those who have compassion for others, and those who don’t. If I thought the same as “them” (those who have no compassion), I’d behave the same as them, which is why I don’t hate them. I just think there’s something wrong inside them and I wish life will serve them the lessons needed to soften their hearts and make them cause less pain in the world.

What was the best book you read?
“Girl, Woman, Other’ by Bernardine Evaristo. It felt to me at the time like the great, last pre-Brexit British novel. I now think it’s also the last great pre-pandemic British novel.

What was your greatest musical discovery?
Sally Dige (who I affectionately call Sally Dirge), for her cold 80s synth pop.

What did you want and get?
Time to work on my novel.

What did you want and didn´t get?
Time to see friends in flesh and blood.

What was your favourite film of this year?
A queer film from Georgia, “And Then We Danced”.
It apparently upset the extreme right-wing in that country. Good!

What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 45. I had a cake, I got some deodorant from my sister-in-law (she’s a Mary Kay and Revlon representative) and a T-shirt from my brother and nephew (I think!) I got messages and phone calls from friends and family. It was very low key.

What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
If everyone had come together in their efforts to stop Covid, instead of having to read (even now) commentary from people who think it’s a big hoax, or who don’t care much for it. That the world had been, as a whole, more New Zealand and less Brazil/USA.

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2020?
Old stained clothes turned into gardening uniform.

What kept you sane?
Amora and Paçoca. Meditation and non-duality teachings.

Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I became briefly enamoured with Matthias Schoenaerts when I saw The Old Guard. A friend in Brazil actually knew him well when she lived in Brussells. She says he’s a wonderful guy. I believe it.

What political issue stirred you the most?
The total car crash that was the American election, and Brazil’s president Bolsonaro’s response to the pandemic.

Who did you miss?
Friends who passed away and friends who live far away.

Who was the best new person you met?
I started informal language chats online with a cousin and some of her friends. We meet once a week and chat in English for an hour. We’ve become friends but still haven’t met in person (which reminds me a little bit of my early years in Livejournal, back in the 2000s). Hopefully I’ll get to share a beer with them in person in 2021.

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2020:
When you meet someone, ask yourself: are they compassionate towards others? That’s all you need to know.

Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
“Don't go changing everything you know
Some things take some time before they grow
And all the thoughts that bring you down
Won't always be there with you now”
- RINSE & Hatchie, “Back Into Your Arms”

Post a picture of something that made you happy this year:



Did you wrong or hurt somebody in 2020?
I may have lost my temper with my mom a few times… I felt horrible afterwards, especially as she always forgot what happened. I had to learn in 2020 how to be housemates with her.

Is there some new place you are planning to visit in 2021?
I’d love to visit London again and have time to see all my friends. We can dream, can’t we?

Where would you have wanted to go and did not in 2020?
São Paulo, London, Montreal, a hot guy's bed… so many places.

Did you learn any new life skill in 2020?
I can make bread off the top of my head. I’ve also perfected eggplant a la parmegiana.

Any new food or drink preferences developed in 2020?
This was the first year in my adult life that I hardly drank any alcohol. It was interesting for me to see how it negatively affected me the few times I had it during Zoom hangouts. I guess I learnt to live without alcohol.

As for foods, I learnt to like beetroot.

What is your greatest fear for 2021?
That the vaccines won’t work and they’ll have to develop new ones and the pandemic will just go on and on and my loved ones mental health will deteriorate, and mine too, and I’ll forget what it’s like to be human.

Did you follow any sports event in 2020?
I accompanied yoga videos on YouTube. Does that count?

Which social media occupied most of your time in 2020?
Probably Twitter. I got all the breaking news about the American election there first.

Is there somebody you feel particularly grateful to this year?
Each and every friend this year who stayed in touch, sent me a message or a letter, showed interest in my wellbeing.

A special shout out to olamina, who I started meeting virtually every Saturday to chat in Portuguese, and who has given me so many interesting things to think about.

Name a hope you have for 2021
That we fill out this form at the end of it with some amazing, magical, happy and exciting stories.

Comments

[sparklielizard.livejournal.com]

It's good to hear about your 2020; I couldn't agree more that being surrounded by nature is "prosperous", absolutely it is!

I really feel for you with your mum. I can't even imagine trying to deal with it all.

I'd love to see you again too - one day, one day...

[picosgemeos.livejournal.com]

Thanks R. Things with my mom are much better than expected, she’s very self sufficient. Only sometimes she does something that winds me up - but it’s really my problem because how can she be blamed for a disease she has no control?! In a way, it’s been a journey for me in learning how to care for someone... I’ve learnt so much.

And it would be great to see you in 2021. Here’s to hoping for a better year for all of us. 😊

[norabird.livejournal.com]

Here’s to a new year!!!

[magic-treehouse.livejournal.com]

This was a really interesting read :)