Tulku, Here We Come
Oct. 18th, 2004 10:21 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dotintheskyWhat is the simplest way to say that I am a Buddhist?
Please refrain from reading this with cynicism.
If you contaminated yourself, then passed on that disease to a loved on... well, I'm not going to blame you anymore. You are a victim too. And if you said something horrible, or I said something horrible, then I want you to know that I am sitting here now, alone, trying to find a way to dispel that negative energy and not let my emotions engage with what doesn't exist. If you found a cave and it was warm enough to live in, maybe you could invite me over some day.
Have you ever met a Buddhist guru? I wonder what they would say to me. All the fortune-tellers have taken my hands, or laid down the cards, and said wonderful things. But scary things too. I wish sometimes that someone would come along and shatter my ego. The Kirlian photograph I took many years ago showed my aura to be very white - the sign of a large ego.
Please destroy my ego. I think I can take it. Or I'll try to bounce it off, like a mirror in a fun house. Like one of the mirrors in the Hayward Gallery fuckingpieceof9poundswastedshitsundaysaturdaywasteddaycrapradio ok you get the point.
A woman was meditating in silence for days, in a retreat. She couldn't talk and slowly her other senses took over the space her mouth had left behind. She noticed the birds outside, their individual faces and the relationships they had with each other. I see this sometimes, but very briefly, and it never occured to me that it might be special. Nature, for some people, is a factory of battery chicken.
I might try to become a vegetarian again, like I was in Montreal. Cows are pretty. And chickens are cuddly.
Please refrain from reading this with cynicism.
If you contaminated yourself, then passed on that disease to a loved on... well, I'm not going to blame you anymore. You are a victim too. And if you said something horrible, or I said something horrible, then I want you to know that I am sitting here now, alone, trying to find a way to dispel that negative energy and not let my emotions engage with what doesn't exist. If you found a cave and it was warm enough to live in, maybe you could invite me over some day.
Have you ever met a Buddhist guru? I wonder what they would say to me. All the fortune-tellers have taken my hands, or laid down the cards, and said wonderful things. But scary things too. I wish sometimes that someone would come along and shatter my ego. The Kirlian photograph I took many years ago showed my aura to be very white - the sign of a large ego.
Please destroy my ego. I think I can take it. Or I'll try to bounce it off, like a mirror in a fun house. Like one of the mirrors in the Hayward Gallery fuckingpieceof9poundswastedshitsundaysaturdaywasteddaycrapradio ok you get the point.
A woman was meditating in silence for days, in a retreat. She couldn't talk and slowly her other senses took over the space her mouth had left behind. She noticed the birds outside, their individual faces and the relationships they had with each other. I see this sometimes, but very briefly, and it never occured to me that it might be special. Nature, for some people, is a factory of battery chicken.
I might try to become a vegetarian again, like I was in Montreal. Cows are pretty. And chickens are cuddly.
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ollie yollie yollie
on 2004-10-18 06:12 pm (UTC)Have you read Journey to Ixtlan? If not, then you really should. I think it would help you clear out the ego issue. Dropping the ego is definitely the hardest thing for us humans...I didn't realize it would be that difficult to stop putting importance on the self.
And come back to vegetarians! I could send you a PETA video that may convince you ;)
<3
Re: ollie yollie yollie
on 2004-10-19 02:16 am (UTC)I spoke to my housemate last night and we decided to give vegetarianism a go - see what happens.
Re: ollie yollie yollie
on 2004-10-19 04:46 am (UTC)Re: ollie yollie yollie
on 2004-10-19 05:08 am (UTC)It's a story of Tibetan Buddhism in the 20th century, but specially seen through key Buddhists that fled Tibet and those in America or Europe. The stories are just incredible, but there's also a lot of the religion's meaning that comes through the way their lives turned out. Actually, it's not even a religion but more of a type of spiritual way of living.
Re: ollie yollie yollie
on 2004-10-19 05:17 am (UTC)i think that's why i like buddhism: rather than being an institution, like religion, it's this tradition of living spiritually, it's light like air.
Re: ollie yollie yollie
on 2004-10-19 05:21 am (UTC)Re: ollie yollie yollie
on 2004-10-19 06:30 pm (UTC)Re: ollie yollie yollie
on 2004-10-20 02:19 am (UTC)no subject
on 2004-10-19 06:41 am (UTC)no subject
on 2004-10-19 06:56 am (UTC)Also, what books can you recommend?
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on 2004-10-19 07:27 am (UTC)He said that sometimes it is the non-Tibetans that do more for the cause of his people. Because they can do more- my brother's wife's family escaped from Tibet after the occupation and like the Dalai Lama lived in India in exile. Haha, we also talked about old movies. He's a funny guy- if you've ever seen "Seven Years In Tibet", you'd see the story of the Dalai Lama and Heinrich Harrer who are still friends (Brad Pitt played Heinrich) also Kundun, and Little Buddha. Good films.
I have several titles on my bookshelf which I'll write down and email you- (I'm at work right now, hahaha)
This is the Bay Area Friends of Tibet website- http://friends-of-tibet.org/index.html Both my brother and his Tibetan wife help to run the organization. http://friends-of-tibet.org/contacts.html you can see my brother Giovanni and his wife Tsering in that picture.
no subject
on 2004-10-19 07:36 am (UTC)here's my email: olliefern @ yahoo. co. uk
♥
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on 2004-10-19 07:45 am (UTC)muah! xoxo
I'll send you lists- :)
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on 2004-10-19 07:47 am (UTC)no subject
on 2004-10-19 08:50 am (UTC)Que livro voce tem lido? Vou a comprar-o! =o) Ja tenho um livro sobre o Dalai Lama se quiser ler-o.
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on 2004-10-19 09:00 am (UTC)Minha mae tem o livro do Dalai Lama... vou emprestar dela. Mas obrigado por oferecer.
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on 2004-10-19 09:11 am (UTC)E nao tem de que, se eu encontrasse mais livros que pode querer ler, di-lo-ei =o)
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on 2004-10-19 09:13 am (UTC)no subject
on 2004-10-19 09:29 am (UTC)Assistiu a reportagem sobre os himalayas domingo passado? Foram a Lhasa para ver os mosteiros... =o)
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on 2004-10-20 02:14 am (UTC)no subject
on 2004-10-19 09:34 am (UTC)Well, or great that you think about it even in the case you wont do it at last.
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on 2004-10-20 02:18 am (UTC)no subject
on 2004-10-20 07:27 am (UTC)The other day I read something funny about it:
I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.
A. Whitney Brown
:D
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on 2004-10-20 08:20 am (UTC)- If people throw lemons at you, make a lemonade.
Mariah Carey.
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on 2004-10-20 08:27 am (UTC)I didnt mean that Whitney...
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0112944/
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on 2004-10-20 08:29 am (UTC)no subject
on 2004-10-23 01:16 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-10-23 05:19 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-10-24 02:54 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-10-25 09:27 am (UTC)no subject
on 2004-10-26 04:39 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-10-27 10:53 am (UTC)no subject
on 2004-10-28 12:18 pm (UTC)I do agree with you. Evil itself has changed its definition over times - a definition that we create. Burning women for growing herbs seemed like a good thing to do centuries ago. Now, I'm not so sure.
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on 2004-10-29 10:55 am (UTC)But getting them crispy only causes a stink. :P
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on 2004-10-30 12:15 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-10-30 05:27 pm (UTC)